16. The Good Manager Effect

Sometimes, the biggest unlock in your career is finding someone who helps you see what you were capable of all along

Most people who grew up in middle-class families in India in the 90s were raised in a culture of compliance. You were taught to listen, obey, and not question too much. Not because your parents were wrong, but because they were doing what they knew. Stability was the goal, and compliance was the safest path to get there.

The problem is, when you're raised that way, you rarely hear "You're good enough." You rarely feel it. Confidence isn't something you're born with; it's something you're taught. And when you're raised in an environment that values obedience over self-expression, it takes years to unlearn that.

This isn't just a childhood thing. It follows you into the workplace. Many companies in India, even today, operate on a basis of compliance rather than encouragement. The manager-employee relationship often mirrors the parent-child dynamic: Do as you're told, meet expectations, don’t ask too many questions.

That works fine if you never step outside that system. But if you end up working in a global company, suddenly you find yourself surrounded by people who carry themselves differently. They speak with confidence, advocate for their ideas, and don’t second-guess themselves the way you do. It’s not that they’re necessarily better. It’s just that no one ever made them doubt their worth the way you learned to.

For a while, you assume that’s just the way things are. That confidence is something other people have, but not you. And then, if you’re lucky, you meet a good manager.

A good manager doesn’t just tell you what to do. They show you what you’re capable of. They see potential in you that you don’t see in yourself, and they push you toward it. They help you unlearn that voice in your head that says, “I’m not good enough.”

And that changes everything.

Once you realise that your ideas, your work, your input—all of it holds real value, your career starts to look different. You stop playing small. You speak up more. You start thinking bigger. It’s like someone turned off the weight holding you down, and now you’re free to move up.

I’ve been lucky to have had managers like this, more than once. And I can tell you that hard work alone won’t get you where you want to go. Plenty of people work hard their entire lives without ever getting the recognition or confidence they need to break through.

Sometimes, the biggest unlock in your career isn’t working harder. It’s having someone who helps you see what you were capable of all along.

And if you ever find a manager like that, hold onto them. They might just change everything.

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Shoutout to all the great managers out there!